1
00:00:00,985 --> 00:00:08,764
等会啊，等会，等会，等会，等会，

2
00:00:08,764 --> 00:00:13,511
等会，过，对，对，对，我跟，我跟琪琪过遍词，

3
00:00:13,511 --> 00:00:19,766
换吧，换吧，来吧，不好意思，我有点走神了，

4
00:00:19,766 --> 00:00:24,948
因为，因为我本来以为咱们俩挺像的，

5
00:00:24,948 --> 00:00:32,655
我以前不是，我不是这样的，我现在有一点，

6
00:00:32,932 --> 00:00:38,757
我就知道，人想要活得快乐，你总要先爱自己，

7
00:00:38,757 --> 00:00:43,012
多余出来的爱才能分给另一半，

8
00:00:43,840 --> 00:00:46,483
你一定非常热爱生活吧，

9
00:00:46,494 --> 00:00:50,750
被你追求的人一定非常幸福吧。

10
00:00:50,750 --> 00:00:55,366
大概吧，我自己也拿不准，

11
00:00:55,366 --> 00:00:59,355
就是你是怎么联系到我的呀，

12
00:00:59,406 --> 00:01:02,658
是生育委员会给你安排的吗？

13
00:01:02,870 --> 00:01:07,310
他那个应该有点透的。

14
00:01:07,310 --> 00:01:09,310
是相熟的朋友介绍的。

15
00:01:09,310 --> 00:01:12,438
相熟的朋友啊，那我知道了，

16
00:01:12,438 --> 00:01:16,350
那那个肯定是大家都认识的那个。

17
00:01:16,350 --> 00:01:23,601
我知道，那个，那你肯定知道他们的项目吧，

18
00:01:23,601 --> 00:01:30,415
那项目，我实话说啊，有点不把人当人看了，

19
00:01:30,821 --> 00:01:33,540
我不知道你怎么想啊，但是，

20
00:01:33,540 --> 00:01:40,760
但是咱们俩也可以去，就是他多少比动物强吧，

21
00:01:40,776 --> 00:01:46,730
他给钱的，咱俩也可以去做那个项目，

22
00:01:46,730 --> 00:01:54,544
然后我们那个，对吧，我们狠狠的生孩子，

23
00:01:54,544 --> 00:02:00,185
然后赚他们的钱，对吧，对吧，

24
00:02:00,185 --> 00:02:02,670
不知道吧。

25
00:02:02,670 --> 00:02:07,261
是他们派你来的是吗，

26
00:02:07,261 --> 00:02:12,137
是他们派你来的是吗，

27
00:02:12,137 --> 00:02:19,994
这什么呀，啊，这什么，

28
00:02:19,994 --> 00:02:27,118
这画书吗，这剧本吧，

29
00:02:27,118 --> 00:02:33,319
安排你你就来了，

30
00:02:33,319 --> 00:02:40,609
说话呀，别推眼镜了，

31
00:02:40,609 --> 00:02:41,910
你，

32
00:02:41,910 --> 00:02:48,821
你还有真的地方吗，

33
00:02:49,176 --> 00:02:56,348
就他们教你这样做的吗，还是说，

34
00:02:56,348 --> 00:03:02,809
你的家人需要器官是吧，对，

35
00:03:02,880 --> 00:03:07,992
我想起来，那个项目，

36
00:03:08,347 --> 00:03:12,820
你的家里人需要器官，对吧。

37
00:03:12,820 --> 00:03:17,995
这不有刀吗，

38
00:03:19,392 --> 00:03:23,532
你要哪个，

39
00:03:23,532 --> 00:03:28,940
我切给你，

40
00:03:28,940 --> 00:03:36,133
我想是有一个扔刀

41
00:03:36,779 --> 00:03:44,283
的话，这，这得回声行吗，

42
00:03:44,283 --> 00:03:47,362
感觉跟耳，

43
00:03:47,362 --> 00:03:53,572
耳返没弄好一样，好，

44
00:03:53,572 --> 00:03:57,220
就要这个，

45
00:03:57,220 --> 00:04:03,827
我直接摊

46
00:04:03,827 --> 00:04:10,902
坐下吧，上楼，行，

47
00:04:10,940 --> 00:04:16,906
这个选项，活着，活着最重要，

48
00:04:16,906 --> 00:04:24,879
我觉得活在最重要的，那它变成什么样，

49
00:04:24,879 --> 00:04:32,063
我都不知道，我想，说明一句，很难，

50
00:04:32,105 --> 00:04:37,932
谢谢感谢，你可能需要一种，

51
00:04:38,195 --> 00:04:45,518
第二个选项，能不能，你敢，你有，解决，

52
00:04:45,518 --> 00:04:51,470
你如果出轨，我也不会，在意。

53
00:04:52,050 --> 00:04:55,420
我知道你，你需要一样，你先先打，

54
00:04:55,420 --> 00:04:59,227
因为我已经很担心你了，谢谢，你会来，

55
00:04:59,227 --> 00:05:03,151
因为你好，谢谢，谢谢帮你，我会帮你做，

56
00:05:03,161 --> 00:05:07,813
我觉得两个人就是在一起，回来，回头，谢谢了，

57
00:05:07,813 --> 00:05:09,590
我要跟你。

58
00:05:09,590 --> 00:05:17,192
天，什么，我感觉你词做了，感觉，

59
00:05:17,192 --> 00:05:24,598
感觉你词做了，你看眼词，哦，OK，

60
00:05:24,663 --> 00:05:28,440
我，我愿意，OK。

61
00:05:28,440 --> 00:05:35,041
你OK

62
00:05:35,041 --> 00:05:39,190
吗

63
00:05:39,190 --> 00:05:40,280
OK啊

64
00:05:40,280 --> 00:05:44,170
我抱太满手没问题

65
00:05:44,170 --> 00:05:48,680
别动啊

66
00:05:48,680 --> 00:05:56,250
站起来吧

67
00:05:56,250 --> 00:05:56,940
站起来

68
00:05:56,940 --> 00:05:59,535
人

69
00:06:00,582 --> 00:06:02,116
类

70
00:06:02,130 --> 00:06:04,560
亲嘴啊

71
00:06:04,570 --> 00:06:07,470
这有什么好说的

72
00:06:07,510 --> 00:06:12,802
希

73
00:06:12,802 --> 00:06:18,095
望

74
00:06:18,095 --> 00:06:23,009
能

75
00:06:23,577 --> 00:06:28,680
够

76
00:06:28,680 --> 00:06:30,580
这是啥呀

77
00:06:30,580 --> 00:06:34,220
人家在帮我看能不能出效果

78
00:06:34,220 --> 00:06:37,160
30岁

79
00:06:37,160 --> 00:06:41,580
30岁

80
00:06:41,580 --> 00:06:48,756
30岁呀

81
00:06:48,790 --> 00:06:54,102
陈辰

82
00:06:54,102 --> 00:07:02,070
老师现在开始

83
00:07:02,070 --> 00:07:04,140
不知道你还能不能点得起来

84
00:07:04,140 --> 00:07:05,649
点得起来

85
00:07:05,670 --> 00:07:06,030
对

86
00:07:06,030 --> 00:07:07,690
反正你有没有怒火

87
00:07:07,690 --> 00:07:09,850
现在感觉很难烧啊

88
00:07:09,850 --> 00:07:10,970
一直在开始

89
00:07:10,970 --> 00:07:15,430
你怎么点

90
00:07:15,430 --> 00:07:16,580
你问他

91
00:07:16,580 --> 00:07:18,200
陈老师

92
00:07:18,200 --> 00:07:22,240
你这个笑到我了

93
00:07:22,240 --> 00:07:22,420
没事

94
00:07:22,420 --> 00:07:25,200
挺好

95
00:07:25,264 --> 00:07:31,320
来吧

96
00:07:31,320 --> 00:07:32,390
选一张C吧

97
00:07:32,390 --> 00:07:33,890
选两张C吧

98
00:07:33,890 --> 00:07:35,310
我就是想要选C

99
00:07:35,310 --> 00:07:35,770
这次吗

100
00:07:35,770 --> 00:07:37,820
OK来看

101
00:07:37,820 --> 00:07:38,780
合选是什么

102
00:07:38,800 --> 00:07:39,060
对

103
00:07:39,060 --> 00:07:39,600
Kara吧

104
00:07:39,600 --> 00:07:42,201
您好

105
00:07:42,230 --> 00:07:42,810
坐下来

106
00:07:42,810 --> 00:07:43,730
咱没有坐

107
00:07:43,730 --> 00:07:44,700
这就您好就完了

108
00:07:44,710 --> 00:07:46,010
因为早点了

109
00:07:46,010 --> 00:07:48,190
我希望咱们两个可以经过认识一下

110
00:07:48,190 --> 00:07:49,660
毕竟我

111
00:07:49,660 --> 00:07:51,240
没有现场迎会

112
00:07:51,240 --> 00:07:55,172
你知道怎么和女孩对话吗

113
00:07:55,190 --> 00:07:56,238
在吗

114
00:07:56,250 --> 00:07:57,330
这个太奇怪了

115
00:07:57,330 --> 00:07:59,310
太奇怪了

116
00:07:59,310 --> 00:08:01,040
你应该是畏畏缩缩的

117
00:08:01,040 --> 00:08:01,840
我应该是畏畏缩缩的

118
00:08:01,840 --> 00:08:02,480
我应该是畏畏缩缩的

119
00:08:02,480 --> 00:08:03,195
OK

120
00:08:03,210 --> 00:08:05,270
应该怎么对话

121
00:08:05,270 --> 00:08:07,341
你让我们和女孩对话吗

122
00:08:07,350 --> 00:08:08,850
在吗

123
00:08:08,850 --> 00:08:11,490
这就是你平时和女性对话的方式

124
00:08:11,490 --> 00:08:14,750
清装的方式

125
00:08:14,750 --> 00:08:15,750
我找了这么久

126
00:08:15,750 --> 00:08:18,210
还是没有一个人和我匹配的

127
00:08:18,210 --> 00:08:22,280
我

128
00:08:22,280 --> 00:08:24,000
可是我们毕竟

129
00:08:24,000 --> 00:08:25,360
身为同一个物种

130
00:08:25,360 --> 00:08:30,930
应该总有相同的地方吧

131
00:08:30,930 --> 00:08:33,070
就像大海里的鱼

132
00:08:33,070 --> 00:08:35,550
遨游大海是它们的使命

133
00:08:35,564 --> 00:08:38,220
直到遇到

134
00:08:38,220 --> 00:08:39,920
直到相遇

135
00:08:39,920 --> 00:08:42,190
我是那条最大的

136
00:08:42,220 --> 00:08:44,370
我是那条雄性安康鱼

137
00:08:44,380 --> 00:08:47,290
我要找到那条最大最大的雌鱼

138
00:08:47,290 --> 00:08:49,050
紧紧的咬上去

139
00:08:49,050 --> 00:08:50,310
和它融为一体

140
00:08:50,310 --> 00:08:51,190
你看

141
00:08:51,210 --> 00:08:52,490
那个

142
00:08:52,490 --> 00:08:54,310
刚好头顶这灯

143
00:08:54,310 --> 00:08:57,240
我是不是你要找那鱼

144
00:08:57,300 --> 00:09:00,650
咱们从爱好开始说吧

145
00:09:00,650 --> 00:09:01,610
你有什么爱好

146
00:09:01,610 --> 00:09:03,500
你怎么不改词了这次

147
00:09:03,500 --> 00:09:07,400
因为刚刚说我的安全眼神

148
00:09:07,400 --> 00:09:12,520
我喜欢那个独自看看电影

149
00:09:12,520 --> 00:09:15,640
然后独自骑行

150
00:09:15,660 --> 00:09:19,910
然后看看街景什么的这些

151
00:09:19,910 --> 00:09:21,350
我喜欢参加派对

152
00:09:21,350 --> 00:09:22,150
出国旅行

153
00:09:22,150 --> 00:09:24,490
樱花神社

154
00:09:24,490 --> 00:09:29,009
我喜欢网络游戏和收集手办

155
00:09:29,020 --> 00:09:32,980
我喜欢限量版的香水和鞋子

156
00:09:32,980 --> 00:09:34,160
你要把收集加上吗

157
00:09:34,160 --> 00:09:35,830
有套吗

158
00:09:35,830 --> 00:09:37,230
都要

159
00:09:37,230 --> 00:09:38,630
也行

160
00:09:38,630 --> 00:09:40,230
我喜欢那个

161
00:09:40,230 --> 00:09:41,630
这个人定情定心

162
00:09:41,630 --> 00:09:43,330
多少钱

163
00:09:43,330 --> 00:09:45,680
我喜欢

164
00:09:45,680 --> 00:09:47,080
你觉得是正规渠道

165
00:09:47,080 --> 00:09:49,080
我喜欢听古典音

166
00:09:49,080 --> 00:09:50,480
是正规渠道

167
00:09:50,480 --> 00:09:51,880
别回头吃辣

168
00:09:51,880 --> 00:09:53,280
在这扎过来

169
00:09:53,280 --> 00:09:54,920
我还有

170
00:09:54,920 --> 00:09:55,920
出了事我找谁去

171
00:09:55,920 --> 00:09:56,830
姓名

172
00:09:56,830 --> 00:09:57,650
梁志斌

173
00:09:57,650 --> 00:09:58,680
年龄

174
00:09:58,680 --> 00:09:59,680
那个

175
00:09:59,680 --> 00:10:02,110
三十

176
00:10:02,110 --> 00:10:04,350
保安

177
00:10:04,350 --> 00:10:05,790
行啊

178
00:10:05,790 --> 00:10:06,790
三千

179
00:10:06,790 --> 00:10:07,390
多少钱

180
00:10:07,390 --> 00:10:09,140
挺多的你别笑

181
00:10:09,154 --> 00:10:10,820
挺多的

182
00:10:10,820 --> 00:10:13,710
我觉得应该直接

183
00:10:13,710 --> 00:10:15,320
直接就背过去

184
00:10:15,320 --> 00:10:18,500
咱俩一起背过去

185
00:10:18,520 --> 00:10:20,090
你觉得需要背靠背吗

186
00:10:20,090 --> 00:10:21,280
我觉得不行

187
00:10:21,280 --> 00:10:23,680
因为咱们当时说的不是面对镜子

188
00:10:23,680 --> 00:10:26,090
反正是有画面

189
00:10:26,090 --> 00:10:28,790
不是在这他的那个表现形式和舞台不一样

190
00:10:28,790 --> 00:10:30,190
和那个序长不一样

191
00:10:30,190 --> 00:10:31,640
OK就直接转过去

192
00:10:31,640 --> 00:10:37,603
那我行我来俩

193
00:10:37,603 --> 00:10:42,820
吧

194
00:10:42,820 --> 00:10:45,260
你还有一句

195
00:10:45,260 --> 00:10:51,170
那个我希望转过头他就走了

196
00:10:51,170 --> 00:10:53,370
没事一会拍的时候你要帮我直接接下一句了

197
00:10:53,370 --> 00:10:54,670
他应该是那个

198
00:10:54,670 --> 00:10:56,390
我希望他不容易

199
00:10:56,390 --> 00:10:58,390
他要是能为我改变就好了

200
00:10:58,390 --> 00:11:02,230
其实喜好也没差太多

201
00:11:02,230 --> 00:11:06,130
我该怎么让他走入我的内心呢

202
00:11:06,130 --> 00:11:09,420
就是也不容易

203
00:11:09,420 --> 00:11:10,140
不容易吧

204
00:11:10,140 --> 00:11:11,030
那种不容易

205
00:11:11,030 --> 00:11:12,400
对

206
00:11:12,400 --> 00:11:14,400
大哥我们干这个也不容易

207
00:11:14,400 --> 00:11:17,930
你想想我们都是熬夜排队

208
00:11:17,930 --> 00:11:20,210
家里老婆孩子要养

209
00:11:20,210 --> 00:11:21,430
要不然谁谁谁

210
00:11:21,430 --> 00:11:22,430
我得让他知道

211
00:11:22,430 --> 00:11:24,210
工作的前景

212
00:11:24,210 --> 00:11:28,300
看他刚才那意思好像不知道这个职业

213
00:11:28,300 --> 00:11:31,940
我得跟他让他知道我是一个有发展的人

214
00:11:31,940 --> 00:11:39,690
女孩都喜欢这个查一下吧

215
00:11:39,690 --> 00:11:42,580
其实我自己也不知道

216
00:11:42,580 --> 00:11:50,330
当保安的前景是什么呀

217
00:11:50,330 --> 00:11:56,080
当保安可以有足够的时间上网聊天

218
00:11:56,080 --> 00:11:56,890
当保安

219
00:11:56,890 --> 00:12:00,630
不是不是不是

220
00:12:00,630 --> 00:12:05,210
那天你还记得陈诚对着我胸打了一拳吗

221
00:12:05,210 --> 00:12:06,410
我喝完酒之后感觉

222
00:12:06,410 --> 00:12:08,190
呼吸的时候胸疼

223
00:12:08,190 --> 00:12:11,060
这已经是前天的事了

224
00:12:11,060 --> 00:12:11,990
但是没缓过来

225
00:12:11,990 --> 00:12:16,390
他就

226
00:12:16,390 --> 00:12:20,424
打

227
00:12:20,572 --> 00:12:26,214
脸其实没事

228
00:12:26,230 --> 00:12:28,050
但是打在胸口就不行

229
00:12:28,050 --> 00:12:32,950
我明白了

230
00:12:32,950 --> 00:12:33,950
打打打打不好了

231
00:12:33,950 --> 00:12:34,950
然后那什么

232
00:12:34,950 --> 00:12:37,550
然后我会有我还会看视频

233
00:12:37,550 --> 00:12:40,521
然后我还可以真正用时间换死工资

234
00:12:40,540 --> 00:12:45,220
陈老师这个衣服

235
00:12:45,230 --> 00:12:47,020
你想给他拍下来吗

236
00:12:47,020 --> 00:12:48,220
我想给他拍一个

237
00:12:48,220 --> 00:12:49,620
你拍完发我微信

238
00:12:49,620 --> 00:12:51,090
OK我来拍

239
00:12:51,090 --> 00:12:55,070
你要别看了

240
00:12:55,070 --> 00:13:01,570
别闹

241
00:13:01,570 --> 00:13:06,970
look at me look at me

242
00:13:06,970 --> 00:13:11,770
然后到你了

243
00:13:11,770 --> 00:13:18,896
你忘

244
00:13:18,896 --> 00:13:24,240
词的

245
00:13:24,240 --> 00:13:25,240
别说说了

246
00:13:25,240 --> 00:13:26,790
我刚打词打

247
00:13:26,790 --> 00:13:29,320
勒勒勒当了吗

248
00:13:29,320 --> 00:13:30,420
不想了我真的

249
00:13:30,420 --> 00:13:31,730
那就是了

250
00:13:31,730 --> 00:13:38,420
当保安

251
00:13:38,420 --> 00:13:39,220
我又往第一条了

252
00:13:39,220 --> 00:13:40,850
当保安可以偷看监控

253
00:13:40,850 --> 00:13:42,550
当保安还可以

254
00:13:42,550 --> 00:13:45,820
还可以在夜里偷偷手淫

255
00:13:45,820 --> 00:13:53,240
当保安还能真正拥有

256
00:13:53,240 --> 00:13:57,454
自己的保安亭

257
00:13:57,480 --> 00:14:05,410
还继续聊吗

258
00:14:05,410 --> 00:14:08,590
我婚后不想被房贷拖累

259
00:14:08,610 --> 00:14:09,810
你有房吗

260
00:14:09,810 --> 00:14:15,806
我租了一个二十平的公寓

261
00:14:15,820 --> 00:14:17,020
太好了

262
00:14:17,020 --> 00:14:18,970
那你有车吗

263
00:14:18,970 --> 00:14:21,530
我有一辆自行车

264
00:14:21,530 --> 00:14:24,320
你的自行车里有座吗

265
00:14:24,320 --> 00:14:25,520
有肯定有

266
00:14:25,520 --> 00:14:26,320
我刚才说的嘛

267
00:14:26,320 --> 00:14:27,320
我我喜欢骑

268
00:14:27,320 --> 00:14:31,250
其实都有后座的

269
00:14:31,250 --> 00:14:35,010
我是个月光族

270
00:14:35,010 --> 00:14:37,921
我也是

271
00:14:37,930 --> 00:14:39,130
刚才不是聊得好好的吗

272
00:14:39,130 --> 00:14:43,130
怎么

273
00:14:43,130 --> 00:14:44,730
我这是在帮你

274
00:14:44,730 --> 00:14:45,930
你你误会我了

275
00:14:45,930 --> 00:14:47,230
就我

276
00:14:47,230 --> 00:14:49,430
你知道三十岁结婚

277
00:14:49,430 --> 00:14:52,461
我我我今天姐来了个电话

278
00:14:52,480 --> 00:14:55,170
我打吧打吧打

279
00:14:55,170 --> 00:14:56,770
到时候你要导演的时候

280
00:14:56,770 --> 00:14:57,570
他拍的时候

281
00:14:57,570 --> 00:14:59,010
他要打仗吧

282
00:14:59,010 --> 00:15:00,410
你看能不能把我眼镜抽飞

283
00:15:00,410 --> 00:15:01,410
你练习一下吧

284
00:15:01,410 --> 00:15:02,970
就大概能打进去

285
00:15:02,970 --> 00:15:03,770
不不不

286
00:15:03,770 --> 00:15:04,370
你不用害怕

287
00:15:04,370 --> 00:15:04,970
你就正常

288
00:15:04,970 --> 00:15:06,370
因为那天苏苏也打了

289
00:15:06,370 --> 00:15:06,970
你就没事

290
00:15:06,970 --> 00:15:07,800
你就撑上来

291
00:15:07,800 --> 00:15:08,960
OK

292
00:15:08,960 --> 00:15:09,760
OK

293
00:15:09,760 --> 00:15:10,560
你就对对

294
00:15:10,560 --> 00:15:11,560
我直接这么杀了

295
00:15:11,560 --> 00:15:12,160
你别你别

296
00:15:12,160 --> 00:15:12,760
就打上

297
00:15:12,760 --> 00:15:13,760
对没事成了

298
00:15:13,760 --> 00:15:14,360
你没事

299
00:15:14,360 --> 00:15:15,160
你不用控制力道

300
00:15:15,160 --> 00:15:15,560
你放心

301
00:15:15,560 --> 00:15:18,220
因为我没有

302
00:15:18,220 --> 00:15:19,420
我没有成成那么好的

303
00:15:19,420 --> 00:15:20,020
用被接

304
00:15:20,020 --> 00:15:21,220
所以说我就不倒的时候

305
00:15:21,220 --> 00:15:21,820
不那么搞的

306
00:15:21,820 --> 00:15:22,620
但你打的时候没事

307
00:15:22,620 --> 00:15:23,220
我可以接住

308
00:15:23,220 --> 00:15:24,700
没事

309
00:15:24,700 --> 00:15:25,500
我重来一次

310
00:15:25,500 --> 00:15:27,210
我把带松一点

311
00:15:27,210 --> 00:15:29,230
OK重来

312
00:15:29,230 --> 00:15:30,230
哎不是没打着

313
00:15:30,230 --> 00:15:32,280
没事重来

314
00:15:32,280 --> 00:15:33,080
没有。

315
00:15:33,080 --> 00:15:35,080
扇巴掌是一件非常困难的事

316
00:15:35,080 --> 00:15:35,680
我确实

317
00:15:35,680 --> 00:15:36,680
因为很多很少人

318
00:15:36,680 --> 00:15:37,480
有这种体验

319
00:15:37,480 --> 00:15:38,480
来吧

320
00:15:38,480 --> 00:15:39,080
等下等下

321
00:15:39,080 --> 00:15:40,480
你别抓那么实体

322
00:15:40,480 --> 00:15:41,680
就是我争两下

323
00:15:41,680 --> 00:15:43,020
然后就可以

324
00:15:43,020 --> 00:15:44,020
我就松开一点

325
00:15:44,020 --> 00:15:44,620
OK

326
00:15:44,620 --> 00:15:46,020
你先争两下

327
00:15:46,020 --> 00:15:47,710
什么

328
00:15:47,710 --> 00:15:50,710
还没飞呢

329
00:15:50,710 --> 00:15:52,310
我真无语

330
00:15:52,310 --> 00:15:53,110
真无语了

331
00:15:53,110 --> 00:15:54,510
你看我怎么才能打飞呀

332
00:15:54,510 --> 00:15:55,110
要么就正常打

333
00:15:55,110 --> 00:15:55,910
你看怎么打飞

334
00:15:55,910 --> 00:15:56,910
正常反手抽的话

335
00:15:56,910 --> 00:15:57,510
我不抓你

336
00:15:57,510 --> 00:15:58,110
正常反手抽

337
00:15:58,110 --> 00:15:59,110
你怎么打飞

338
00:15:59,110 --> 00:16:01,420
都扇不着

339
00:16:01,420 --> 00:16:02,850
可以

340
00:16:02,850 --> 00:16:03,450
我看不见了

341
00:16:03,450 --> 00:16:04,450
帮我找找那镜片

342
00:16:04,450 --> 00:16:05,170
这儿的

343
00:16:05,170 --> 00:16:05,770
对反

344
00:16:05,770 --> 00:16:06,370
就这样就这样

345
00:16:06,370 --> 00:16:07,170
没有没有没有

346
00:16:07,170 --> 00:16:07,770
你你大概找到

347
00:16:07,770 --> 00:16:08,770
你找到这感觉了吗

348
00:16:08,770 --> 00:16:10,180
找到这感觉了吗

349
00:16:10,180 --> 00:16:10,980
我再带上这个

350
00:16:10,980 --> 00:16:11,580
没有镜片的

351
00:16:11,580 --> 00:16:11,980
没事没事

352
00:16:11,980 --> 00:16:14,630
你再来一次

353
00:16:14,630 --> 00:16:15,230
你再来一次

354
00:16:15,230 --> 00:16:15,630
对对对

355
00:16:15,630 --> 00:16:18,700
大概能打着

356
00:16:18,700 --> 00:16:20,030
不行

357
00:16:20,030 --> 00:16:21,830
因为我只能这么溜你的镜片

358
00:16:21,830 --> 00:16:23,523
你才能飞

359
00:16:24,219 --> 00:16:25,771
出来

360
00:16:25,780 --> 00:16:28,180
小粉人给我一巴掌

361
00:16:28,180 --> 00:16:31,790
我感觉好羞辱

362
00:16:31,790 --> 00:16:32,590
我的我的我的

363
00:16:32,590 --> 00:16:33,190
帮我穿一下

364
00:16:33,190 --> 00:16:34,200
你看你再来

365
00:16:34,200 --> 00:16:35,000
等我带松一点

366
00:16:35,000 --> 00:16:38,020
OK

367
00:16:38,020 --> 00:16:38,820
可以可以可以

368
00:16:38,820 --> 00:16:43,810
然后然后你再说你的猜测

369
00:16:43,810 --> 00:16:44,710
镜片

370
00:16:44,710 --> 00:16:51,860
镜片镜片镜片

371
00:16:51,860 --> 00:16:52,570
啊

372
00:16:52,570 --> 00:16:53,580
真走了

373
00:16:53,580 --> 00:16:54,580
啊不是我不是真走了

374
00:16:54,580 --> 00:16:55,380
我我还在找你

375
00:16:55,380 --> 00:17:03,330
你得叫住我

376
00:17:03,330 --> 00:17:08,710
啊真走了

377
00:17:08,710 --> 00:17:10,770
我还以为真正犯

378
00:17:10,770 --> 00:17:13,940
我还以为真正犯到AA呢

379
00:17:13,940 --> 00:17:17,790
这妈真亏

380
00:17:17,790 --> 00:17:18,190
OK

381
00:17:18,190 --> 00:17:18,590
OK

382
00:17:18,590 --> 00:17:19,430
OK

383
00:17:19,430 --> 00:17:21,690
你还用过词吗

384
00:17:21,690 --> 00:17:23,990
我觉得还可以

385
00:17:23,990 --> 00:17:24,790
你可以在那个

386
00:17:24,790 --> 00:17:25,390
读牌的时候

387
00:17:25,390 --> 00:17:26,390
把手机那个打开

388
00:17:26,390 --> 00:17:27,590
然后就能记住

389
00:17:27,590 --> 00:17:32,430
能能能看着念

390
00:17:32,430 --> 00:17:32,830
OK

391
00:17:32,830 --> 00:17:35,690
OK

392
00:17:35,690 --> 00:17:36,290
Beggar

393
00:17:36,290 --> 00:17:38,600
Where's the beggar?

394
00:17:38,600 --> 00:17:40,200
Beggar

395
00:17:40,210 --> 00:17:43,300
Beggar

396
00:17:43,300 --> 00:17:45,394
Beggar

397
00:17:45,430 --> 00:17:48,980
Come on, beggar.

398
00:17:48,980 --> 00:17:49,980
你不像个乞丐

399
00:17:49,980 --> 00:17:57,160
最起码不该是吧

400
00:17:57,160 --> 00:18:03,600
我不觉得

401
00:18:03,600 --> 00:18:04,600
为什么他打完一下之后

402
00:18:04,600 --> 00:18:06,860
我眼镜片吸不进去了

403
00:18:06,860 --> 00:18:07,460
哦

404
00:18:07,460 --> 00:18:09,710
现在还是提考

405
00:18:09,710 --> 00:18:11,510
但实际上

406
00:18:11,510 --> 00:18:14,601
全人类需要你们去解放。

407
00:18:14,620 --> 00:18:15,820
我跟你可不一样

408
00:18:15,820 --> 00:18:17,620
我比你有用极了

409
00:18:17,620 --> 00:18:19,420
我每天都会和我的业主说

410
00:18:19,420 --> 00:18:20,620
早安晚安

411
00:18:20,620 --> 00:18:21,420
晚安

412
00:18:21,420 --> 00:18:22,020
晚安晚安

413
00:18:22,020 --> 00:18:23,440
早安午安晚安

414
00:18:23,440 --> 00:18:24,640
感觉好像楚门的世界呀

415
00:18:24,640 --> 00:18:26,230
这个话

416
00:18:26,230 --> 00:18:27,830
如果我们明天再也见不到了

417
00:18:27,830 --> 00:18:28,830
那我祝你

418
00:18:28,830 --> 00:18:30,875
good noon good

419
00:18:30,937 --> 00:18:32,000
afternoon good

420
00:18:32,134 --> 00:18:33,070
evening

421
00:18:33,070 --> 00:18:37,220
为了朋友的生命

422
00:18:37,220 --> 00:18:44,920
我告诉他要戴好口罩

423
00:18:44,920 --> 00:18:47,920
哎别着凉了

424
00:18:47,920 --> 00:18:49,160
哎哟

425
00:18:49,160 --> 00:18:50,690
满足够

426
00:18:50,690 --> 00:18:52,400
没啥人觉得生命这样的

427
00:18:52,400 --> 00:18:53,510
继续对

428
00:18:53,510 --> 00:18:54,310
同意的

429
00:18:54,310 --> 00:18:55,310
对啊

430
00:18:55,310 --> 00:18:56,510
地上生发的东西

431
00:18:56,510 --> 00:18:57,710
别人觉得有东西

432
00:18:57,710 --> 00:18:59,310
生发都是阳气

433
00:18:59,310 --> 00:18:59,910
那你这么说

434
00:18:59,910 --> 00:19:01,510
我岂不是被动的践行了

435
00:19:01,510 --> 00:19:03,890
你的那个什么无用主义

436
00:19:03,890 --> 00:19:10,998
你想要阴

437
00:19:10,998 --> 00:19:12,754
气

438
00:19:12,810 --> 00:19:20,143
我们都是准

439
00:19:20,265 --> 00:19:21,540
备

440
00:19:21,540 --> 00:19:22,940
都是待割的韭菜

441
00:19:22,940 --> 00:19:25,860
这就是我们的共同点

442
00:19:25,860 --> 00:19:27,680
这么认为的

443
00:19:27,680 --> 00:19:29,300
看

444
00:19:29,300 --> 00:19:32,560
没有被疙瘩害死

445
00:19:32,560 --> 00:19:34,560
像我这样一无所有的人

446
00:19:34,560 --> 00:19:35,280
不会

447
00:19:35,280 --> 00:19:36,480
根本就没有这种

448
00:19:36,480 --> 00:19:38,840
莫名其妙的家人

449
00:19:38,840 --> 00:19:39,980
啊

450
00:19:39,980 --> 00:19:42,170
像我这样一无所有的人

451
00:19:42,170 --> 00:19:43,570
这就是我们的共同点

452
00:19:43,570 --> 00:19:44,770
我也是一无所有的

453
00:19:44,770 --> 00:19:45,370
你不会觉得累吗

454
00:19:45,370 --> 00:19:46,370
这样压在你胳膊上

455
00:19:46,370 --> 00:19:47,790
OK

456
00:19:47,790 --> 00:19:48,790
这就是我们的共同点

457
00:19:48,790 --> 00:19:50,390
我也是一个一无所有的人

458
00:19:50,390 --> 00:19:50,790
真的吗

459
00:19:50,790 --> 00:19:51,800
真的

460
00:19:51,800 --> 00:19:53,010
那我们是不是可以

461
00:19:53,010 --> 00:19:54,190
对

462
00:19:54,190 --> 00:19:55,390
或许我们可以去穷游

463
00:19:55,390 --> 00:19:56,410
去爬山

464
00:19:56,410 --> 00:20:01,630
我们

465
00:20:01,630 --> 00:20:03,800
我还可以下班

466
00:20:03,800 --> 00:20:04,680
不对

467
00:20:04,680 --> 00:20:08,420
我兴许可以早点敲班去

468
00:20:08,420 --> 00:20:12,480
敲班或者早点下班去看你

469
00:20:12,480 --> 00:20:14,590
我们肯定不会分开的

470
00:20:14,590 --> 00:20:15,220
对吗

471
00:20:15,220 --> 00:20:17,470
躺那边去

472
00:20:17,470 --> 00:20:18,770
我们一定不会分开的

473
00:20:18,770 --> 00:20:19,380
对吗

474
00:20:19,380 --> 00:20:22,260
你相信奇迹

475
00:20:22,260 --> 00:20:27,150
快躺下

476
00:20:27,150 --> 00:20:27,800
啊

477
00:20:27,800 --> 00:20:29,240
什么

478
00:20:29,240 --> 00:20:30,250
这个警察当哪

479
00:20:30,250 --> 00:20:31,050
我是说

480
00:20:31,050 --> 00:20:31,850
警察

481
00:20:31,850 --> 00:20:33,050
两个合适的人

482
00:20:33,050 --> 00:20:34,720
因为这个角色是警察

483
00:20:34,720 --> 00:20:35,920
你还有个警察的角色

484
00:20:35,920 --> 00:20:38,520
我当然相信

485
00:20:38,520 --> 00:20:39,630
我看

486
00:20:39,630 --> 00:20:40,330
看

487
00:20:40,330 --> 00:20:41,330
那你跟他谈了没

488
00:20:41,330 --> 00:20:42,130
那是我曾经

489
00:20:42,130 --> 00:20:42,930
没事你躺下就行

490
00:20:42,930 --> 00:20:44,150
躺下看就行

491
00:20:44,150 --> 00:20:46,440
那是我曾经管理的小区

492
00:20:46,440 --> 00:20:47,580
谈了没

493
00:20:47,580 --> 00:20:51,380
我曾经以为我是小区里的底层

494
00:20:51,380 --> 00:20:52,730
仰望着上面的阶层

495
00:20:52,730 --> 00:20:53,730
但是后来我发现

496
00:20:53,730 --> 00:20:54,930
警察倒不用真谈

497
00:20:54,930 --> 00:20:56,130
其实连楼都没进去

498
00:20:56,130 --> 00:20:57,930
一般只有服务警才真打

499
00:20:57,930 --> 00:21:00,439
警察就是

500
00:21:01,470 --> 00:21:02,376
对

501
00:21:02,390 --> 00:21:05,120
我会支持你的

502
00:21:05,120 --> 00:21:07,000
我当然会支持你的

503
00:21:07,000 --> 00:21:10,760
我肯定会支持你

504
00:21:10,760 --> 00:21:13,020
他们说人家我们要吗

505
00:21:13,020 --> 00:21:16,140
看来我没有办法

506
00:21:16,140 --> 00:21:19,290
我们就会

507
00:21:19,290 --> 00:21:20,250
开始

508
00:21:20,250 --> 00:21:22,350
但是没有

509
00:21:22,350 --> 00:21:23,750
结果我就不相信你

510
00:21:23,750 --> 00:21:25,350
可是

511
00:21:25,350 --> 00:21:26,150
我们还有

512
00:21:26,150 --> 00:21:27,560
你有口袋吗

513
00:21:27,560 --> 00:21:29,230
你看这有口袋

514
00:21:29,230 --> 00:21:31,140
可是我们还有爱情

515
00:21:31,140 --> 00:21:33,480
这比什么都重要

516
00:21:33,480 --> 00:21:37,520
但我们的爱情

517
00:21:37,566 --> 00:21:44,630
但是爱情或许可以无视掉这条规则

518
00:21:44,630 --> 00:21:47,600
你没有必要这么执着

519
00:21:47,600 --> 00:21:55,115
我不

520
00:21:55,115 --> 00:21:57,620
是

521
00:21:57,620 --> 00:21:59,840
我是说我爱你

522
00:21:59,840 --> 00:22:01,640
我爱你就足够了

523
00:22:01,640 --> 00:22:04,180
我忘词了

524
00:22:04,180 --> 00:22:05,180
这句话应该是什么

525
00:22:05,180 --> 00:22:05,780
我爱你

526
00:22:05,780 --> 00:22:06,580
然后什么

527
00:22:06,580 --> 00:22:08,340
我认为爱情

528
00:22:08,340 --> 00:22:11,070
就是可以无视掉这条规则

529
00:22:11,070 --> 00:22:12,640
对了

530
00:22:12,640 --> 00:22:13,240
接着说

531
00:22:13,240 --> 00:22:21,400
对

532
00:22:21,400 --> 00:22:24,090
我们或许可以不依赖共同点活下去

533
00:22:24,090 --> 00:22:24,890
不就是先是

534
00:22:24,890 --> 00:22:26,490
我们可以不依赖共同点活下去

535
00:22:26,490 --> 00:22:27,490
然后是爱情

536
00:22:27,490 --> 00:22:29,090
当然可以无视掉这条规则

537
00:22:29,090 --> 00:22:34,390
没

538
00:22:34,390 --> 00:22:39,690
错

539
00:22:39,690 --> 00:22:42,900
一个主动的无用者

540
00:22:42,900 --> 00:22:44,230
没想

541
00:22:44,230 --> 00:22:49,540
没有你口中的工作

542
00:22:49,540 --> 00:22:51,340
如果你愿意放下一切

543
00:22:51,340 --> 00:22:53,850
主动靠近你说不为啥都要做

544
00:22:53,850 --> 00:22:58,050
你就快要到处了

545
00:22:58,050 --> 00:23:00,420
你是冷吗

546
00:23:00,420 --> 00:23:08,070
没在尽情去

547
00:23:08,070 --> 00:23:12,839
看来你只是强迫自己相信一个荒谬的观点来迎合我

548
00:23:12,850 --> 00:23:15,950
因为达成你的目的

549
00:23:15,950 --> 00:23:18,310
你永远都不会改变的

550
00:23:18,310 --> 00:23:21,749
哪怕是为了生活

551
00:23:21,760 --> 00:23:23,970
哪怕是为了活下去

552
00:23:23,970 --> 00:23:27,190
这个生活为了活下去的意思不一样

553
00:23:27,190 --> 00:23:28,040
不一样

554
00:23:28,040 --> 00:23:29,760
哪怕是为了活下去

555
00:23:29,760 --> 00:23:33,560
哪怕是为了活下去

556
00:23:33,560 --> 00:23:35,820
这已经开始了吗

557
00:23:35,820 --> 00:23:37,020
就知道了

558
00:23:37,020 --> 00:23:40,780
陈辰老师开始跳舞的时候就开始了

559
00:23:40,780 --> 00:23:44,913
这个小粉人

560
00:23:44,913 --> 00:23:51,791
真的是太习惯了

561
00:23:51,860 --> 00:23:53,410
走着也

562
00:23:53,410 --> 00:23:54,610
你说旋转的时候

563
00:23:54,610 --> 00:23:56,410
那咱俩走一次

564
00:23:56,410 --> 00:23:57,210
围住着来吧

565
00:23:57,210 --> 00:23:58,820
这不有柱子吗

566
00:23:58,820 --> 00:24:03,680
围着柱子

567
00:24:03,680 --> 00:24:04,280
开始吧

568
00:24:04,280 --> 00:24:05,260
咱们

569
00:24:07,110 --> 00:24:12,290
没有我刚就一个膝盖我就磕了一下

570
00:24:12,290 --> 00:24:16,914
咱走着演

571
00:24:16,914 --> 00:24:24,620
试试

572
00:24:24,620 --> 00:24:28,100
我其实有一段还没记下来呢

573
00:24:28,100 --> 00:24:31,250
我并不后悔

574
00:24:31,250 --> 00:24:32,850
我并不后悔

575
00:24:32,850 --> 00:24:34,790
我还有一天时间呢

576
00:24:34,790 --> 00:24:38,190
就说可以做朋友那啊

577
00:24:38,190 --> 00:24:39,590
但他算是我好朋友吗

578
00:24:39,590 --> 00:24:40,390
好像也不算

579
00:24:40,390 --> 00:24:42,200
但是无所谓了

580
00:24:42,200 --> 00:24:43,800
我我还可以回家

581
00:24:43,800 --> 00:24:46,060
我可以去乡下

582
00:24:46,060 --> 00:24:47,770
给我父母磕个头

583
00:24:47,770 --> 00:24:49,570
我狠狠地啃啃老

584
00:24:49,570 --> 00:24:51,320
但是

585
00:24:51,320 --> 00:24:52,720
我真希望做这水的时候

586
00:24:52,920 --> 00:24:54,810
突然就炸开了

587
00:24:54,810 --> 00:24:56,440
你这衣服太骚了

588
00:24:56,440 --> 00:24:58,540
还穿着深色内裤

589
00:24:58,540 --> 00:25:05,024
我觉得那

590
00:25:05,069 --> 00:25:11,553
天当时表

591
00:25:11,553 --> 00:25:17,414
演的时候

592
00:25:18,060 --> 00:25:19,980
我可能也会先周两瓶

593
00:25:19,980 --> 00:25:20,680
然后再演

594
00:25:20,680 --> 00:25:25,000
我喝不了白的

595
00:25:25,000 --> 00:25:26,000
但我可以喝窝子看

596
00:25:26,000 --> 00:25:30,275
是

597
00:25:30,275 --> 00:25:34,550
吗

598
00:25:34,550 --> 00:25:41,564
你站在灯下

599
00:25:41,697 --> 00:25:43,200
黑

600
00:25:43,200 --> 00:25:49,612
大家等会帮我拍一支影片

601
00:25:49,750 --> 00:25:51,580
叫我们拍一支

602
00:25:51,580 --> 00:25:59,081
把我们拍得像

603
00:25:59,081 --> 00:26:06,462
那些在街角偷偷飞叶

604
00:26:06,462 --> 00:26:11,140
子的人

605
00:26:11,140 --> 00:26:18,002
这个

606
00:26:18,002 --> 00:26:24,520
能这个确实能

607
00:26:24,520 --> 00:26:31,756
但你这一口得挺

608
00:26:31,756 --> 00:26:33,910
浓的

609
00:26:33,910 --> 00:26:34,750
或者你这样

610
00:26:34,750 --> 00:26:37,310
你那一口烟进来之后

611
00:26:37,310 --> 00:26:38,610
就是很浓郁的一口

612
00:26:38,610 --> 00:26:39,410
电子烟更好

613
00:26:39,410 --> 00:26:40,310
因为它烟雾量大

614
00:26:40,310 --> 00:26:40,990
你进来之后

615
00:26:40,990 --> 00:26:44,800
要帮你

616
00:26:44,800 --> 00:26:46,610
要帮你

617
00:26:46,610 --> 00:26:48,240
就把牙齿

618
00:26:48,240 --> 00:26:50,944
然后轻轻的咳嗽

619
00:26:51,000 --> 00:26:57,320
对它就出来了

620
00:26:57,320 --> 00:26:58,520
你说烟灰怎么办

621
00:26:58,520 --> 00:26:59,790
你再给我借一下烟

622
00:26:59,790 --> 00:27:01,450
OK

623
00:27:01,450 --> 00:27:03,020
你知道我选的C是什么吗

624
00:27:03,020 --> 00:27:05,050
我选的C

625
00:27:05,050 --> 00:27:05,530
对

626
00:27:05,530 --> 00:27:07,010
你选了C

627
00:27:07,010 --> 00:27:08,130
对，我选了C

628
00:27:08,130 --> 00:27:08,770
它是什么呢

629
00:27:08,770 --> 00:27:09,090
所以

630
00:27:09,090 --> 00:27:11,840
知道我是谁吗

631
00:27:11,840 --> 00:27:13,000
那是计划生育委员会给你配的

632
00:27:13,000 --> 00:27:14,040
我是

633
00:27:14,040 --> 00:27:15,340
计划生育委员会

634
00:27:15,340 --> 00:27:18,900
的会长

635
00:27:18,900 --> 00:27:19,620
我给你拍

636
00:27:19,620 --> 00:27:20,750
张老师

637
00:27:20,750 --> 00:27:21,890
我给你拍了

638
00:27:21,890 --> 00:27:22,870
我给你拍了

639
00:27:22,870 --> 00:27:23,570
我给你拍了

640
00:27:23,570 --> 00:27:24,470
我给你拍了

641
00:27:24,690 --> 00:27:25,370
我给你拍了

642
00:27:25,370 --> 00:27:26,530
我给你拍了

643
00:27:26,530 --> 00:27:28,090
就是

644
00:27:28,090 --> 00:27:31,340
你们就随便

645
00:27:31,340 --> 00:27:35,320
这个我发了

646
00:27:35,320 --> 00:27:42,440
我发了去

647
00:27:42,440 --> 00:27:44,800
计划生育委员会又是什么

648
00:27:44,800 --> 00:27:46,320
怎么了干嘛

649
00:27:46,320 --> 00:27:48,240
它是一个

650
00:27:48,240 --> 00:27:48,800
所以生育委员会

651
00:27:48,800 --> 00:27:50,430
就站这儿给钱

652
00:27:50,430 --> 00:27:52,390
就

653
00:27:52,390 --> 00:27:52,650
就这样

654
00:27:52,650 --> 00:27:53,900
所以呢

655
00:27:53,900 --> 00:27:55,180
所以它需要

656
00:27:55,180 --> 00:27:58,140
他们会给你配对一个生育委员的礼件

657
00:27:58,140 --> 00:28:00,470
像这个生育委员

658
00:28:00,480 --> 00:28:01,300
生完孩子之后

659
00:28:01,300 --> 00:28:02,260
谁的手机

660
00:28:02,260 --> 00:28:03,670
他会给你

661
00:28:03,670 --> 00:28:04,550
你狗房

662
00:28:04,550 --> 00:28:05,090
不牢啊

663
00:28:05,090 --> 00:28:07,190
我自己绑在那里

664
00:28:07,190 --> 00:28:10,078
你把它直接挑上去

665
00:28:10,090 --> 00:28:10,850
你最近干啥呢

666
00:28:10,850 --> 00:28:11,437
sorry

667
00:28:11,450 --> 00:28:14,590
哈哈哈哈

668
00:28:14,590 --> 00:28:16,010
相机嘛

669
00:28:16,010 --> 00:28:17,166
什么是长

670
00:28:17,190 --> 00:28:18,170
都长款

671
00:28:18,170 --> 00:28:20,390
太帅了

672
00:28:20,390 --> 00:28:21,610
太帅了

673
00:28:21,610 --> 00:28:22,890
什么东西

674
00:28:22,890 --> 00:28:23,900
什么东西

675
00:28:23,900 --> 00:28:26,530
我没有啊

676
00:28:26,530 --> 00:28:28,910
你能帮我帮我拿着吗

677
00:28:28,910 --> 00:28:29,990
这点

678
00:28:29,990 --> 00:28:34,730
太帅了

679
00:28:34,730 --> 00:28:36,070
但是你这他妈的

680
00:28:36,070 --> 00:28:37,450
你这是配种啊

681
00:28:37,460 --> 00:28:38,890
还给钱呢

682
00:28:38,910 --> 00:28:41,200
这不是配对啊

683
00:28:41,200 --> 00:28:45,700
所以你不是缺件器官吗

684
00:28:45,700 --> 00:28:47,300
缺件器官

685
00:28:47,300 --> 00:28:48,300
我仨好没聊到这个

686
00:28:48,300 --> 00:28:52,520
为什么要有缺件器官啊

687
00:28:52,520 --> 00:28:54,520
所以你不是缺件器官吗

688
00:28:54,520 --> 00:28:55,790
那个

689
00:28:55,790 --> 00:28:57,770
我出来说你

690
00:28:57,770 --> 00:28:59,460
你就不过去害他啊

691
00:28:59,460 --> 00:29:00,520
什么意思啊

692
00:29:00,520 --> 00:29:02,120
嘿嘿嘿

693
00:29:02,120 --> 00:29:03,140
什么什么

694
00:29:03,140 --> 00:29:07,963
什么什么

695
00:29:08,030 --> 00:29:09,480
呜

696
00:29:09,500 --> 00:29:10,880
耶

697
00:29:10,880 --> 00:29:13,500
他这个深色的平角裤太

698
00:29:13,500 --> 00:29:14,740
太

699
00:29:14,740 --> 00:29:15,820
是臭的是吗这是

700
00:29:15,820 --> 00:29:16,820
还要跳了还要跳了

701
00:29:16,820 --> 00:29:19,210
会闻好

702
00:29:19,210 --> 00:29:20,210
哦~

703
00:29:20,210 --> 00:29:26,235
O

704
00:29:26,235 --> 00:29:32,260
K

705
00:29:32,260 --> 00:29:33,320
OK

706
00:29:33,320 --> 00:29:39,760
感谢

707
00:29:39,760 --> 00:29:40,760
OK 我发给你

708
00:29:40,760 --> 00:29:41,930
让我看一眼

709
00:29:41,930 --> 00:29:43,960
不用多拍

710
00:29:43,960 --> 00:29:45,070
看一下后面

711
00:29:45,070 --> 00:29:47,800
啊好变态啊我穿这个

712
00:29:47,800 --> 00:29:52,860
你tmd帮我庆祝干嘛

713
00:29:52,860 --> 00:29:54,860
谁啊

714
00:29:54,860 --> 00:30:01,130
特反差你们都是黑的

715
00:30:02,010 --> 00:30:03,470
OK

716
00:30:03,470 --> 00:30:04,470
OK 我发给你

717
00:30:04,470 --> 00:30:09,821
直接

718
00:30:09,821 --> 00:30:17,656
抓给我

719
00:30:17,656 --> 00:30:23,580
也行

720
00:30:23,580 --> 00:30:24,580
OK

721
00:30:24,580 --> 00:30:25,650
能直接抓给你吗

722
00:30:25,650 --> 00:30:26,650
我这发微信吧

723
00:30:26,650 --> 00:30:28,400
微信快

724
00:30:28,400 --> 00:30:29,220
直接抓也可以

725
00:30:29,220 --> 00:30:30,220
也可以

726
00:30:30,220 --> 00:30:33,760
看看啊

727
00:30:33,760 --> 00:30:34,680
你是哪个

728
00:30:34,680 --> 00:30:41,200
Frank father

729
00:30:41,200 --> 00:30:42,400
婆婆祖

730
00:30:42,400 --> 00:30:43,400
婆婆祖 OK

731
00:30:43,400 --> 00:30:47,590
不是你是头发的

732
00:30:47,590 --> 00:30:49,890
所以我不像乞丐

733
00:30:49,890 --> 00:30:50,890
OK

734
00:30:50,890 --> 00:31:00,500
呜

735
00:31:00,500 --> 00:31:12,020
啊

736
00:31:12,020 --> 00:31:15,780
这个地可能他妈够硬的

737
00:31:15,780 --> 00:31:16,780
没事没事我会摔的

738
00:31:16,780 --> 00:31:17,780
我会摔的

739
00:31:17,780 --> 00:31:18,780
我自己摔下试试呗

740
00:31:18,780 --> 00:31:19,770
眼镜上给你

741
00:31:19,770 --> 00:31:20,720
我自己摔下试试

742
00:31:20,720 --> 00:31:23,970
我怕我摔疼了

743
00:31:23,970 --> 00:31:28,740
这个地我操

744
00:31:28,740 --> 00:31:30,260
这硬地啊

745
00:31:30,260 --> 00:31:35,280
刀合法有问题啊

746
00:31:35,280 --> 00:31:37,540
这硬地

747
00:31:37,540 --> 00:31:45,121
你这样推我

748
00:31:45,121 --> 00:31:48,370
一下

749
00:31:48,370 --> 00:31:49,370
给我一个力

750
00:31:49,370 --> 00:31:50,330
我摔出去

751
00:31:50,330 --> 00:31:51,470
就后面推我一下

752
00:31:51,470 --> 00:31:52,470
我摔出去

753
00:31:52,470 --> 00:31:55,220
刚刚我扳你脚的时候

754
00:31:55,220 --> 00:31:56,220
你也是朝前摔

755
00:31:56,220 --> 00:31:57,360
对所以你从

756
00:31:57,360 --> 00:31:58,360
不过你从我后背

757
00:31:58,360 --> 00:31:59,360
给我一个力

758
00:31:59,360 --> 00:32:00,360
然后我从往前

759
00:32:00,360 --> 00:32:01,360
我往前腾一下摔出去

760
00:32:01,360 --> 00:32:02,360
我试试什么力度

761
00:32:02,360 --> 00:32:04,300
我这样能自己控好

762
00:32:04,300 --> 00:32:05,300
没事我肩不露整

763
00:32:05,300 --> 00:32:06,300
你来吧

764
00:32:06,300 --> 00:32:07,240
你来吧

765
00:32:07,240 --> 00:32:08,240
从后面推我一下

766
00:32:08,240 --> 00:32:09,240
不不不

767
00:32:09,240 --> 00:32:10,240
不要这样

768
00:32:10,240 --> 00:32:11,240
就那样

769
00:32:11,240 --> 00:32:12,220
双手直接推出去那种

770
00:32:12,220 --> 00:32:13,410
等会啊

771
00:32:13,410 --> 00:32:14,410
我先

772
00:32:14,410 --> 00:32:15,410
我得先起来点

773
00:32:15,410 --> 00:32:17,320
OK

774
00:32:17,320 --> 00:32:18,320
没事

775
00:32:18,320 --> 00:32:19,320
直接给力就行

776
00:32:19,320 --> 00:32:23,520
不是很疼

777
00:32:23,520 --> 00:32:24,520
不摔膝盖的话就不疼

778
00:32:24,520 --> 00:32:25,520
没事

779
00:32:25,520 --> 00:32:26,520
我尽量再试一下

780
00:32:26,520 --> 00:32:27,520
你把眼镜放边上去

781
00:32:27,520 --> 00:32:28,510
没事

782
00:32:28,510 --> 00:32:31,290
来来来试一下

783
00:32:31,290 --> 00:32:33,520
来

784
00:32:33,520 --> 00:32:35,680
我往那边摔呀

785
00:32:35,680 --> 00:32:36,680
对

786
00:32:36,680 --> 00:32:43,990
不行不行

787
00:32:43,990 --> 00:32:44,990
太深了

788
00:32:44,990 --> 00:32:45,990
我有点不敢摔这地

789
00:32:45,990 --> 00:32:48,250
这木头地我就敢摔

790
00:32:48,250 --> 00:32:50,220
这摔一下我怕受不了

791
00:32:50,220 --> 00:32:55,300
你知道为什么不敢摔吗

792
00:32:55,300 --> 00:32:56,300
其实最开始

793
00:32:56,300 --> 00:32:57,300
我一开始做的时候挺敢摔的

794
00:32:57,300 --> 00:32:58,300
后来有一次

795
00:32:58,300 --> 00:33:01,460
不是我在做那什么时候

796
00:33:01,460 --> 00:33:02,460
那次有一次有一个

797
00:33:02,460 --> 00:33:04,460
送水的那个工人

798
00:33:04,460 --> 00:33:05,280
给我们送水

799
00:33:05,280 --> 00:33:06,280
上楼梯的时候

800
00:33:06,280 --> 00:33:07,090
他提了两桶水

801
00:33:07,090 --> 00:33:08,360
然后一下脚滑了

802
00:33:08,360 --> 00:33:09,360
啪在那儿

803
00:33:09,360 --> 00:33:11,360
然后他膝盖磕碎了

804
00:33:11,360 --> 00:33:12,140
我后来就不敢摔了

805
00:33:12,140 --> 00:33:14,140
我怕我膝盖也碎了

806
00:33:14,140 --> 00:33:16,340
他当时就真起不来劲

807
00:33:16,340 --> 00:33:18,700
在那呆住了

808
00:33:18,700 --> 00:33:19,510
动都不敢动

809
00:33:19,510 --> 00:33:21,390
他整个那个髌骨都碎了

810
00:33:21,390 --> 00:33:23,680
就叫救护车送走了

811
00:33:23,680 --> 00:33:24,500
来一次试试

812
00:33:24,500 --> 00:33:29,710
我尽量不膝盖着地就好

813
00:33:29,710 --> 00:33:30,720
我往前扑就得了

814
00:33:30,720 --> 00:33:31,720
我让胸着地就得了

815
00:33:31,720 --> 00:33:32,720
来

816
00:33:32,720 --> 00:33:39,340
OK OK

817
00:33:39,340 --> 00:33:40,340
我是腹部着地

818
00:33:40,340 --> 00:33:44,780
OK

819
00:33:44,780 --> 00:33:47,260
早在那天POCO给我那一拳

820
00:33:47,260 --> 00:33:48,260
这两天

821
00:33:48,260 --> 00:33:54,208
呼吸

822
00:33:54,208 --> 00:34:00,156
的时

823
00:34:00,156 --> 00:34:03,130
候

824
00:34:03,130 --> 00:34:04,420
不是就感觉这儿

825
00:34:04,420 --> 00:34:07,330
就感觉这儿那个疼

826
00:34:07,330 --> 00:34:08,330
渣滋都能疼

827
00:34:08,330 --> 00:34:10,340
POCO那个砰一下那一下

828
00:34:10,340 --> 00:34:11,700
我这两天

829
00:34:11,700 --> 00:34:12,700
呼吸的时候

830
00:34:12,700 --> 00:34:13,700
不是就感觉这儿

831
00:34:13,700 --> 00:34:14,700
就感觉这儿那个

832
00:34:14,700 --> 00:34:15,400
这两天

833
00:34:15,400 --> 00:34:18,310
抽气的时候感觉这儿是那什么

834
00:34:18,310 --> 00:34:25,002
我刚开始

835
00:34:25,002 --> 00:34:32,607
出来那个不是野

836
00:34:32,607 --> 00:34:33,520
兽

837
00:34:33,520 --> 00:34:34,590
就是野兽

838
00:34:34,590 --> 00:34:36,240
就是个孩子

839
00:34:36,240 --> 00:34:37,240
然后到后面有台词那一段

840
00:34:37,240 --> 00:34:38,240
我是

841
00:34:38,240 --> 00:34:39,240
没有台词了

842
00:34:39,240 --> 00:34:41,240
后来是我第二幕是我抱着你出来

843
00:34:41,240 --> 00:34:44,090
然后第三幕是是咱打架

844
00:34:44,090 --> 00:34:44,890
还有本吗

845
00:34:44,890 --> 00:34:50,402
刚才

846
00:34:50,402 --> 00:34:55,914
我那

847
00:34:55,914 --> 00:34:58,670
本呢

848
00:34:58,670 --> 00:34:59,670
我拿本看一眼

849
00:34:59,670 --> 00:35:01,550
后面那词记不住

850
00:35:01,550 --> 00:35:15,595
O

851
00:35:15,595 --> 00:35:29,640
K

852
00:35:29,640 --> 00:35:30,960
OK

853
00:35:30,960 --> 00:35:36,490
没

854
00:35:36,490 --> 00:35:42,020
到

855
00:35:42,020 --> 00:35:47,108
咱

856
00:35:47,108 --> 00:35:53,080
们

857
00:35:53,080 --> 00:35:53,880
第一场

858
00:35:53,880 --> 00:36:01,520
先是哪一场

859
00:36:01,520 --> 00:36:03,430
场

860
00:36:03,430 --> 00:36:05,430
先是泡泡跳舞

861
00:36:05,430 --> 00:36:06,540
然后我出来读评论

862
00:36:06,540 --> 00:36:07,540
然后不是他出来那个啥吗

863
00:36:07,540 --> 00:36:08,540
准备好了吗

864
00:36:08,540 --> 00:36:09,680
准备好了就拍一下手

865
00:36:09,680 --> 00:36:10,680
都没准备好呢

866
00:36:10,680 --> 00:36:11,560
不是

867
00:36:11,560 --> 00:36:12,560
后面那个麻木的那段

868
00:36:12,560 --> 00:36:13,560
先是泡泡跳舞

869
00:36:13,560 --> 00:36:16,460
然后我出来读评论

870
00:36:16,460 --> 00:36:17,280
然后不是他出来那个啥吗

871
00:36:17,280 --> 00:36:18,357
准备好了吗

872
00:36:18,497 --> 00:36:20,258
演讲是不是在我前面？

873
00:36:20,277 --> 00:36:23,747
顺啊，一段一段走啊，着什么急啊。

874
00:36:23,747 --> 00:36:24,347
OK。

875
00:36:24,347 --> 00:36:26,707
不是连着从头到尾完事了，干嘛呢？

876
00:36:26,707 --> 00:36:27,187
OK。

877
00:36:27,187 --> 00:36:28,197
快快快。

878
00:36:28,197 --> 00:36:30,307
那你独白快上啊。

879
00:36:30,307 --> 00:36:31,748
不是先泡泡吗？

880
00:36:31,767 --> 00:36:35,237
啊，泡泡今天演那个乞丐吧。

881
00:36:35,247 --> 00:36:38,394
不演了，没有这个事了。

882
00:36:38,407 --> 00:36:40,458
那很刻意。

883
00:36:40,497 --> 00:36:41,747
口罩戴吧。

884
00:36:41,747 --> 00:36:44,538
那个铁罩带吧。

885
00:36:44,567 --> 00:36:45,717
那你戴口罩吧。不戴。

886
00:36:45,727 --> 00:36:48,425
那你先弄吧。

887
00:36:48,567 --> 00:36:52,224
啊，

888
00:36:52,287 --> 00:36:58,466
糟了。

889
00:36:58,907 --> 00:37:06,797
酒

890
00:37:08,375 --> 00:37:18,237
精

891
00:37:22,182 --> 00:37:28,494
消

892
00:37:28,494 --> 00:37:35,594
耗

893
00:37:37,172 --> 00:37:45,457
完

894
00:37:45,457 --> 00:37:53,741
了

895
00:37:53,741 --> 00:38:08,337
。

896
00:38:08,337 --> 00:38:15,472
啊

897
00:38:15,472 --> 00:38:22,607
哈。

898
00:38:24,057 --> 00:38:27,437
啊。

899
00:38:27,437 --> 00:38:45,673
啊

900
00:38:49,092 --> 00:39:03,148
。

901
00:39:08,467 --> 00:39:25,785
啊

902
00:39:27,517 --> 00:39:46,567
。

903
00:39:46,567 --> 00:39:48,334
你会合身轻松吗？

904
00:39:48,427 --> 00:39:49,811
我好轻松。

905
00:39:49,837 --> 00:39:54,797
没有

906
00:39:54,797 --> 00:39:58,482
呢，

907
00:39:58,983 --> 00:40:06,171
才刚两分多。

908
00:40:06,217 --> 00:40:08,267
OK，我介绍一下。

909
00:40:08,267 --> 00:40:10,777
接下来，你换，换点情绪吧。

910
00:40:10,787 --> 00:40:14,027
现在你这个耗尽反为攻击性。

911
00:40:14,027 --> 00:40:19,058
转移到需要

912
00:40:19,058 --> 00:40:25,082
大家的目光。

913
00:40:25,197 --> 00:40:27,777
就是，你需要把大家吸到你这儿。

914
00:40:27,777 --> 00:40:29,677
如果他们不搭理，你就发怒。

915
00:40:29,677 --> 00:40:32,317
攻击性。

916
00:40:32,317 --> 00:40:34,202
入侵性。

917
00:40:34,217 --> 00:40:58,612
对

918
00:40:58,612 --> 00:41:23,007
。

919
00:41:23,007 --> 00:41:23,497
嗯。

920
00:41:23,527 --> 00:41:30,328
只要在这儿搞，

921
00:41:30,328 --> 00:41:37,535
就真搞瘦

922
00:41:37,535 --> 00:41:41,697
了。

923
00:41:41,697 --> 00:41:48,552
呵

924
00:41:48,552 --> 00:41:55,407
呵

925
00:41:55,407 --> 00:42:02,076
。

926
00:42:02,447 --> 00:42:03,807
我很疼，他啃我了。

927
00:42:03,807 --> 00:42:16,786
对

928
00:42:16,786 --> 00:42:29,765
吧

929
00:42:29,765 --> 00:42:40,384
。

930
00:42:43,137 --> 00:42:49,789
再借我一下，你发，你现在要，

931
00:42:49,789 --> 00:42:55,179
要一个，你可以选择啊，要么是迅速的，

932
00:42:55,179 --> 00:42:57,645
要么是多的，慢的，

933
00:42:58,084 --> 00:43:03,838
大家都等到不断的一个方式，下场。

934
00:43:03,857 --> 00:43:06,925
但是，先，临下场之前，

935
00:43:06,925 --> 00:43:10,037
你的声音要填满整个空间一下。

936
00:43:10,037 --> 00:43:15,537
要告诉大家，你从来过。

937
00:43:15,537 --> 00:43:17,847
还是，就还是一个。

938
00:43:17,847 --> 00:43:18,998
嗨嗨嗨。

939
00:43:19,047 --> 00:43:20,157
嗨嗨嗨。

940
00:43:20,407 --> 00:43:20,807
对。

941
00:43:20,807 --> 00:43:21,687
哈哈嗨。

942
00:43:21,687 --> 00:43:22,567
还是啊。

943
00:43:22,567 --> 00:43:23,497
打一盒喜动。

944
00:43:23,607 --> 00:43:25,388
啊。

945
00:43:25,497 --> 00:43:27,097
哈哈哈哈。

946
00:43:27,097 --> 00:43:29,837
这个，这个小人跑得真的很喜感。

947
00:43:29,837 --> 00:43:52,838
哈

948
00:43:52,838 --> 00:44:15,839
哈

949
00:44:15,839 --> 00:44:37,108
。

950
00:44:39,087 --> 00:44:43,757
妈的，都是谁写的呀？

951
00:44:43,757 --> 00:44:46,104
读评论嘛。

952
00:44:46,147 --> 00:44:50,427
看你们写的都什么妈的东西。

953
00:44:50,427 --> 00:44:52,425
学得好。

954
00:44:52,617 --> 00:44:54,413
这昵称不错。

955
00:44:54,447 --> 00:44:57,698
我说的，就跟狗屎一样。

956
00:44:57,707 --> 00:44:58,860
哎。

957
00:44:58,897 --> 00:45:00,367
爱情不爱情。

958
00:45:00,367 --> 00:45:04,477
爱情有，他妈蛋也有嘛。

959
00:45:04,477 --> 00:45:06,320
想读一天得了。

960
00:45:06,367 --> 00:45:07,437
我也懒读了。

961
00:45:07,537 --> 00:45:14,087
这样吧，找个安静点地方睡一下吧。

962
00:45:14,087 --> 00:45:16,877
妈的，可困死妈的，这一宿。

963
00:45:16,877 --> 00:45:19,997
哎

964
00:45:19,997 --> 00:45:25,197
呦

965
00:45:25,197 --> 00:45:33,140
我今天

966
00:45:34,463 --> 00:45:40,798
三十

967
00:45:40,798 --> 00:45:43,824
岁

968
00:45:44,108 --> 00:45:50,537
了。

969
00:45:50,537 --> 00:45:55,597
三十岁

970
00:45:55,597 --> 00:45:58,539
啊，

971
00:45:58,539 --> 00:46:02,658
三十

972
00:46:02,658 --> 00:46:06,777
岁。

973
00:46:06,777 --> 00:46:10,108
迎来的是身体机能的退化，

974
00:46:10,108 --> 00:46:14,127
而且我也失去了黄金般的睡眠。

975
00:46:14,127 --> 00:46:19,727
哎，每天看超过十条广告，就头疼。

976
00:46:19,727 --> 00:46:25,967
电梯，对我来说就是牢房。

977
00:46:25,967 --> 00:46:28,967
我进了地铁站，就好像下了地狱了。

978
00:46:28,967 --> 00:46:35,132
我曾经有一个远在天边的女友。

979
00:46:35,384 --> 00:46:42,535
本来约定好今天结婚的，三十岁嘛，但是，好像，

980
00:46:42,535 --> 00:46:46,931
我好像也等不到那么长时间，

981
00:46:47,023 --> 00:46:51,212
因为我的欲望很强烈，所以，

982
00:46:51,212 --> 00:46:55,815
我们见面的欲望就在一次一次的滋味里面被我

983
00:46:55,815 --> 00:46:57,227
消磨掉了。

984
00:46:57,227 --> 00:47:03,571
这也不是我的错啊，那一打开手机了，

985
00:47:03,571 --> 00:47:11,198
各种各种的美女，就上来了，那，一本正经的，

986
00:47:11,198 --> 00:47:17,921
扭来扭去的，穿职业装的，穿，穿短裙的，

987
00:47:17,921 --> 00:47:24,666
穿黑丝的，白丝的，呃，穿着高跟鞋皮靴，

988
00:47:24,712 --> 00:47:30,117
还有那种洛丽塔，想想就。

989
00:47:33,107 --> 00:47:40,046
想想就，他妈爽，我操，有点来感觉了，

990
00:47:40,046 --> 00:47:46,515
不好意思啊，有时候我心里也在想，

991
00:47:46,920 --> 00:47:51,006
到底是她上面长了个我，

992
00:47:51,006 --> 00:47:57,866
还是我上面长了个她呀，说回正事吧，

993
00:47:57,866 --> 00:48:02,698
缓缓，我女朋友曾经说过，

994
00:48:02,698 --> 00:48:08,616
恋爱只有在发生的一瞬间才是真实的，

995
00:48:08,616 --> 00:48:11,287
不管你认不认同，但是，

996
00:48:12,367 --> 00:48:19,394
她的意思就是说，后面，其实都是惯性和幻觉，

997
00:48:19,543 --> 00:48:23,074
我们都是在回味那个刚刚获得爱情的自己，

998
00:48:23,074 --> 00:48:28,652
都是在找最初的状态，于是我们就分手了，呃，

999
00:48:29,411 --> 00:48:34,414
其实我真能挽回她的，我，撒谎不就行了吗，

1000
00:48:34,414 --> 00:48:38,198
以前我也这么干的，但是这次，

1001
00:48:38,198 --> 00:48:41,717
我也不准备撒谎了，因为，

1002
00:48:45,977 --> 00:48:50,734
但是，呃，就是合不合适的，

1003
00:48:51,055 --> 00:48:56,949
我们每天都在日复一日的逛街，吃饭，傻笑，

1004
00:48:57,037 --> 00:49:00,713
然后晚上做爱，呃，但是，

1005
00:49:00,713 --> 00:49:05,923
这种回味也总有腻的那一天，所以，

1006
00:49:05,923 --> 00:49:09,577
就像面包上的黄油涂得不够多，

1007
00:49:09,577 --> 00:49:12,469
那面包就他妈不香了呀，

1008
00:49:12,855 --> 00:49:17,767
所以这次我也决定不撒谎了，就这样，因为，

1009
00:49:18,967 --> 00:49:22,879
我也腻了，我虽然丢了爱情，但是我觉得，

1010
00:49:22,926 --> 00:49:26,804
这其实就像我游戏打了一半一样，我发现，

1011
00:49:26,804 --> 00:49:30,121
就打了一半，发现我倒是走错了，

1012
00:49:30,132 --> 00:49:35,271
那又能怎么样呢，我会选择，大不了读档吧，

1013
00:49:35,271 --> 00:49:37,724
或者我重开就好了。

1014
00:49:37,807 --> 00:49:40,600
您好，梁先生。

1015
00:49:41,267 --> 00:49:43,221
我先祝您生日快乐。

1016
00:49:43,467 --> 00:49:47,167
鉴于您还有两天就到达三十岁高龄，

1017
00:49:47,167 --> 00:49:48,327
收入偏低，

1018
00:49:48,327 --> 00:49:51,247
并试图繁衍后代，

1019
00:49:51,247 --> 00:49:53,497
我这边给您推荐一个套餐。

1020
00:49:53,507 --> 00:49:56,217
套餐A，购买一个婴儿；

1021
00:49:56,217 --> 00:49:59,777
套餐B，收养一个婴儿；

1022
00:49:59,777 --> 00:50:02,037
套餐C，分配一名女性。

1023
00:50:02,037 --> 00:50:06,207
你们说的是什么呀？

1024
00:50:06,207 --> 00:50:09,717
这，你分配一个女性，

1025
00:50:09,717 --> 00:50:11,987
她人都是自由的，

1026
00:50:12,017 --> 00:50:12,887
我总不能……

1027
00:50:12,897 --> 00:50:14,687
她要跑可怎么办呀？

1028
00:50:14,737 --> 00:50:16,777
我总不能把她关在家里头吧？

1029
00:50:16,777 --> 00:50:19,842
那我不跟畜生一样吗？

1030
00:50:19,907 --> 00:50:23,437
不对，你能给我这个选项，

1031
00:50:23,437 --> 00:50:25,177
那你就是比畜生还畜生。

1032
00:50:25,177 --> 00:50:26,312
好的，先生。

1033
00:50:26,347 --> 00:50:28,027
你选择套餐C。

1034
00:50:28,027 --> 00:50:29,457
谢谢您的配合，再见。

1035
00:50:29,837 --> 00:50:36,279
不是，等会儿，有病吧，什么电话啊，

1036
00:50:36,542 --> 00:50:43,932
我找找我东西，我收拾收拾，呃，就这样吧，

1037
00:50:43,932 --> 00:50:49,835
我今天晚上还有一场约会了，呃，

1038
00:50:49,835 --> 00:50:57,356
你们也知道我挺不乐意去应付女人的，啊，

1039
00:50:57,356 --> 00:51:04,177
走吧，啊，约会，我应该去哪儿呢？

1040
00:51:04,177 --> 00:51:06,097
套要吗？

1041
00:51:06,097 --> 00:51:08,977
套要吗？

1042
00:51:08,977 --> 00:51:09,878
套要吗？

1043
00:51:09,887 --> 00:51:11,034
套要吗？

1044
00:51:11,057 --> 00:51:13,424
卖，卖什么？

1045
00:51:13,517 --> 00:51:17,997
套，要不要？

1046
00:51:17,997 --> 00:51:21,237
来，哪来的货呀？

1047
00:51:21,237 --> 00:51:26,783
排队嘛，从刚开始管控那会儿，天天开始排队，

1048
00:51:26,783 --> 00:51:29,625
你要是要这个0.01，

1049
00:51:29,625 --> 00:51:34,927
我现在给我兄弟打个电话，一会儿他就送过来。

1050
00:51:34,927 --> 00:51:39,129
没必要的，0.01,0.01，随便给我来，

1051
00:51:39,129 --> 00:51:42,451
普通就行，就简单就行，给我来点。

1052
00:51:42,677 --> 00:51:44,757
400。

1053
00:51:44,757 --> 00:51:45,527
太贵了。

1054
00:51:45,527 --> 00:51:46,207
太贵了。

1055
00:51:46,207 --> 00:51:50,072
便宜，便宜点，便宜点，便宜点就有。

1056
00:51:50,087 --> 00:51:52,595
我这从刚开始，上有老下有小的，

1057
00:51:52,595 --> 00:51:55,227
中间还有个老婆等着我养活呢。

1058
00:51:55,227 --> 00:52:00,617
哎，不说了，不说了。

1059
00:52:00,617 --> 00:52:08,387
这他妈啊，我400块钱，这样换算一下，

1060
00:52:08,406 --> 00:52:11,289
我要不吃不喝，

1061
00:52:11,289 --> 00:52:16,718
不吃不喝这一月能设15次，

1062
00:52:16,718 --> 00:52:23,458
我要正常生活的话也就这两次。

1063
00:52:23,458 --> 00:52:27,727
这不是能机器在用吗？

1064
00:52:27,727 --> 00:52:33,270
梁先生，

1065
00:52:33,270 --> 00:52:38,982
是

1066
00:52:38,982 --> 00:52:45,197
吗？

1067
00:52:45,197 --> 00:52:47,228
哦，Kara是吧，您好。

1068
00:52:47,247 --> 00:52:51,387
我希望咱们两个能够在一起。

1069
00:52:51,387 --> 00:52:53,751
我希望可以互相快速认识一下，

1070
00:52:53,751 --> 00:52:56,097
毕竟我还要赶去下一场约会。

1071
00:52:56,097 --> 00:52:56,607
哎。

1072
00:52:56,657 --> 00:52:58,542
你知道怎么和女孩搭讪对吧？

1073
00:52:58,607 --> 00:53:02,719
呃，那个，在吗？

1074
00:53:02,997 --> 00:53:06,235
这就是和女孩平时说话的方式？

1075
00:53:06,287 --> 00:53:09,717
嗯。

1076
00:53:10,437 --> 00:53:16,517
我找了这么久，还是没有一个人和我是匹配的。

1077
00:53:16,517 --> 00:53:21,565
可是，咱们两个人是同一个物种，

1078
00:53:21,565 --> 00:53:24,742
总有相配的地方吧。

1079
00:53:24,827 --> 00:53:29,497
人就像大海里的鱼，遨游大海是他们的使命。

1080
00:53:29,497 --> 00:53:33,611
直到相遇，我是那条雄性安康鱼，

1081
00:53:33,632 --> 00:53:37,776
我想找到那条最大最大最大的雌鱼，

1082
00:53:37,797 --> 00:53:41,667
紧紧的咬住它，和它融为一体。

1083
00:53:41,667 --> 00:53:44,641
嗯，你看，你看我头顶这个灯，

1084
00:53:44,641 --> 00:53:47,244
我是不是你要找的那条鱼？

1085
00:53:47,387 --> 00:53:51,434
咱们从喜好开始说吧，你有什么喜好？

1086
00:53:51,517 --> 00:53:55,267
呃，呃，我喜欢，我喜欢看电影，呃，

1087
00:53:55,277 --> 00:53:59,556
有时候我会自己骑着自行车出去逛逛。

1088
00:53:59,647 --> 00:54:03,777
我喜欢看街景。

1089
00:54:03,777 --> 00:54:07,637
我喜欢参加派对，出国旅行，樱花神社。

1090
00:54:07,637 --> 00:54:12,567
呃，呃，我喜欢网络游戏和收集手办。

1091
00:54:12,567 --> 00:54:16,360
我喜欢限量版的香水和鞋子。

1092
00:54:16,437 --> 00:54:18,297
呃，那个，我喜欢听流行歌。

1093
00:54:18,297 --> 00:54:20,297
我喜欢听古典语。

1094
00:54:20,297 --> 00:54:21,297
我爱吃辣。

1095
00:54:21,297 --> 00:54:22,297
我不爱吃。

1096
00:54:22,297 --> 00:54:27,077
我还有……

1097
00:54:27,077 --> 00:54:28,077
姓名？

1098
00:54:28,077 --> 00:54:29,207
梁志斌。

1099
00:54:29,207 --> 00:54:30,069
年龄？

1100
00:54:30,087 --> 00:54:32,047
呃，三十。

1101
00:54:32,047 --> 00:54:32,851
职业？

1102
00:54:32,867 --> 00:54:35,607
呃，保安。

1103
00:54:35,607 --> 00:54:36,657
三千。

1104
00:54:36,657 --> 00:54:42,601
三千？嗯，别笑，真挺多的，我觉得还可以吧，

1105
00:54:42,601 --> 00:54:44,122
三千，是吧？

1106
00:54:44,327 --> 00:54:50,707
我希望我转过头的那一刻，他就可以离开这里了，

1107
00:54:50,707 --> 00:54:53,453
这真的是太离谱了。

1108
00:54:53,557 --> 00:54:58,720
我觉得我能改变他，他要是能为我改变该多好啊，

1109
00:54:58,799 --> 00:55:02,763
其实刚才的喜好没差太多吧，

1110
00:55:02,776 --> 00:55:06,582
我该怎么才能让他走入我的内心呢？

1111
00:55:06,727 --> 00:55:12,217
我觉得两个不同阶级的人融在一起就是悲剧。

1112
00:55:12,217 --> 00:55:16,632
我是说，开始的时候就知道要分开了，

1113
00:55:16,632 --> 00:55:19,697
那么为什么要在一起呢？

1114
00:55:19,697 --> 00:55:21,936
我得跟他聊聊我的工作，

1115
00:55:22,064 --> 00:55:25,027
他肯定不知道这份工作有多好。

1116
00:55:25,027 --> 00:55:30,687
我得查查怎么拒绝，如何委婉地拒绝一个男人。

1117
00:55:30,687 --> 00:55:33,584
呃，我得查一查保安的前景，

1118
00:55:33,701 --> 00:55:37,517
其实我也不知道这工作有什么好的。

1119
00:55:37,537 --> 00:55:44,175
我们还是当朋友好了，我觉得我真不适合你，

1120
00:55:44,606 --> 00:55:46,496
朋友才是长久。

1121
00:55:46,757 --> 00:55:51,534
当保安可以，呃，有足够的时间上网聊天，

1122
00:55:51,648 --> 00:55:53,435
当保安可以看视频，

1123
00:55:53,444 --> 00:55:56,387
当保安还能真正用时间换死工资，

1124
00:55:56,387 --> 00:55:58,698
这我以前都没想到啊。

1125
00:55:59,157 --> 00:56:05,266
你人真的挺好的，我才没戏往关了，

1126
00:56:05,266 --> 00:56:08,053
我孩子要喂奶。

1127
00:56:08,297 --> 00:56:11,743
当保安，我还能晚上偷看监控呢，

1128
00:56:11,743 --> 00:56:16,156
真是我以前都没做过这事，当保安我还能，

1129
00:56:16,156 --> 00:56:18,827
还能在夜里偷偷手淫。

1130
00:56:18,827 --> 00:56:22,905
当保安还能真正拥有自己的保安亭，太香了，

1131
00:56:22,905 --> 00:56:24,395
我得跟他说说。

1132
00:56:24,557 --> 00:56:32,211
咱还继续，咱还继续聊吗？

1133
00:56:32,237 --> 00:56:37,166
我婚后不想被房贷拖累，你有房吗？

1134
00:56:37,267 --> 00:56:42,079
有，我自己租了一个二十平的公寓。

1135
00:56:42,177 --> 00:56:46,918
啊，你有车吗？

1136
00:56:47,027 --> 00:56:50,888
呃，我刚才也跟你提到了，我有一辆自行车。

1137
00:56:50,967 --> 00:56:53,007
那你车上有座吗？

1138
00:56:53,007 --> 00:56:55,887
有，那个，呃，当然有车座了。

1139
00:56:55,897 --> 00:57:00,717
那太好了，你有，你有，你有，呃，你有收入吗？

1140
00:57:00,717 --> 00:57:04,637
呃，有，我，虽然我没有积蓄，我是个月光族。

1141
00:57:04,717 --> 00:57:08,066
太巧了，我也是月光族。

1142
00:57:08,077 --> 00:57:12,957
是吗，哎，等会儿，你，你刚才不是聊好好的吗？

1143
00:57:12,957 --> 00:57:13,663
就你。

1144
00:57:13,677 --> 00:57:18,031
我把手机打掉了，呃，我这是在帮你，

1145
00:57:18,097 --> 00:57:21,412
你要知道那个，我们时间都不多了，三十岁，

1146
00:57:21,423 --> 00:57:24,605
结婚，我跟你说我今天早上来了个电话。

1147
00:57:24,727 --> 00:57:28,097
你？你也帮我？

1148
00:57:28,097 --> 00:57:31,147
嘿，你回去骑你的破自行车吧，

1149
00:57:31,198 --> 00:57:33,966
真他妈的想土鳖变疯狂的。

1150
00:57:34,137 --> 00:57:36,557
怎么想的？

1151
00:57:36,557 --> 00:57:38,767
啊？

1152
00:57:38,767 --> 00:57:40,937
你死定了。

1153
00:57:40,937 --> 00:57:46,974
走啊。

1154
00:57:47,097 --> 00:57:50,385
我还以为这顿，

1155
00:57:50,407 --> 00:57:55,859
那这顿饭谁跟我挨啊，我，

1156
00:57:55,859 --> 00:57:59,731
他妈不亏死我了。

1157
00:58:00,077 --> 00:58:06,216
哎，天天静而回。

1158
00:58:06,357 --> 00:58:13,139
我其

1159
00:58:13,139 --> 00:58:18,728
实

1160
00:58:18,728 --> 00:58:25,286
并不

1161
00:58:26,926 --> 00:58:29,013
后

1162
00:58:29,013 --> 00:58:36,167
悔

1163
00:58:36,167 --> 00:58:40,514
啊，其实我也不是很着急，

1164
00:58:40,514 --> 00:58:44,187
毕竟我还有两天呢。

1165
00:58:44,187 --> 00:58:46,717
两天来说吧。

1166
00:58:46,717 --> 00:58:48,717
你说我能做的事儿可太多了。

1167
00:58:48,717 --> 00:58:51,664
嗯，大不了，如果时间不够了，

1168
00:58:51,769 --> 00:58:54,587
我还可以去我朋友那儿住。

1169
00:58:54,587 --> 00:58:59,144
应该能算是朋友吧，但是，好像好朋友也算不上。

1170
00:58:59,237 --> 00:59:01,787
但应该算我朋友。

1171
00:59:01,787 --> 00:59:04,557
实在不行。

1172
00:59:04,557 --> 00:59:06,957
实在不行，我就从城市离开。

1173
00:59:06,957 --> 00:59:09,127
我还回到乡下。

1174
00:59:09,127 --> 00:59:10,168
哎。

1175
00:59:10,397 --> 00:59:13,747
给我父母磕磕头。

1176
00:59:13,747 --> 00:59:16,057
狠狠地啃啃老。

1177
00:59:16,057 --> 00:59:17,037
也不是不行。

1178
00:59:17,037 --> 00:59:21,827
哎呀，做个水。

1179
00:59:21,827 --> 00:59:23,943
哎。

1180
00:59:24,407 --> 00:59:25,932
啊。

1181
00:59:26,267 --> 00:59:29,527
看着这水壶，有时候我他妈真想……

1182
00:59:29,527 --> 00:59:35,187
做水的时候，这水壶，突然他妈的就爆炸了。

1183
00:59:35,187 --> 00:59:38,816
等我再醒过来的时候，

1184
00:59:39,023 --> 00:59:43,827
我还躺在老家的麦地里。

1185
00:59:43,827 --> 00:59:47,527
还是一个没长毛的孩子。

1186
00:59:47,527 --> 00:59:54,235
这样我就有机会修正我以前的错误了，比如说，

1187
00:59:54,396 --> 00:59:55,550
不好好上学。

1188
00:59:55,577 --> 01:00:00,977
我确实应该好好上学的，这他妈学校真挺有用的。

1189
01:00:00,977 --> 01:00:04,547
如果我当初不在课堂睡觉，我应该也不会在学校。

1190
01:00:04,547 --> 01:00:08,291
我应该也不会在专科院校里自甘堕落。

1191
01:00:08,367 --> 01:00:15,563
我觉得这水壶还是挺重要的。

1192
01:00:15,587 --> 01:00:21,480
像我那些同学，都是一些社会垃圾、烟鬼，

1193
01:00:21,621 --> 01:00:23,825
都是这些人。

1194
01:00:23,837 --> 01:00:27,784
但是他们后来却当了小学老师，

1195
01:00:27,865 --> 01:00:33,847
包括一些机构的辅导老师之类的。

1196
01:00:33,907 --> 01:00:38,053
这对下一代影响得多大呀。

1197
01:00:38,067 --> 01:00:40,191
真是……

1198
01:00:40,657 --> 01:00:45,397
哎。

1199
01:00:46,437 --> 01:00:49,877
醒醒吧，梁志斌。

1200
01:00:49,877 --> 01:00:51,877
你他妈知道你以后当保安吗？

1201
01:00:51,877 --> 01:00:56,072
我

1202
01:00:56,072 --> 01:01:03,763
看你

1203
01:01:03,763 --> 01:01:07,259
这

1204
01:01:07,259 --> 01:01:10,755
样

1205
01:01:11,688 --> 01:01:15,650
，

1206
01:01:15,650 --> 01:01:19,845
你

1207
01:01:19,845 --> 01:01:24,040
好

1208
01:01:24,040 --> 01:01:28,235
像

1209
01:01:28,235 --> 01:01:32,431
也

1210
01:01:32,431 --> 01:01:38,956
不像

1211
01:01:43,152 --> 01:01:49,211
个乞

1212
01:01:49,211 --> 01:01:53,407
丐

1213
01:01:53,407 --> 01:01:57,602
呀

1214
01:01:57,835 --> 01:02:01,564
。

1215
01:02:01,797 --> 01:02:07,617
最起码，看你这意思，你也不该是个乞丐吧。

1216
01:02:07,617 --> 01:02:09,877
这就是我的职业呀。

1217
01:02:09,877 --> 01:02:12,907
你不觉得很好玩吗？

1218
01:02:12,907 --> 01:02:15,397
我崇尚无用主义。

1219
01:02:15,397 --> 01:02:18,387
我在用我的行为去对抗这个功能至上的社会。

1220
01:02:18,397 --> 01:02:21,502
虽然看起来是乞讨，但实际上，

1221
01:02:21,595 --> 01:02:24,461
我只是在收取我演出的小费。

1222
01:02:24,627 --> 01:02:25,627
我不这么觉得。

1223
01:02:25,627 --> 01:02:27,377
我可比你有用多了。

1224
01:02:27,377 --> 01:02:31,273
至少我的业主每天会期待我跟他们说早安、

1225
01:02:31,273 --> 01:02:32,517
午安、晚安。

1226
01:02:32,517 --> 01:02:34,357
我是一个有用的人。

1227
01:02:34,357 --> 01:02:37,037
但那也未必是有用的呀。

1228
01:02:37,037 --> 01:02:42,987
你要知道，别人觉得有价值才是真的有价值。

1229
01:02:42,987 --> 01:02:50,042
那我岂不是被动地践行了你刚才说的那个什么无

1230
01:02:50,042 --> 01:02:51,552
用主义吗？

1231
01:02:51,787 --> 01:02:54,567
你说的好像也没错。

1232
01:02:54,567 --> 01:02:58,119
如果我们能够再找到一个共同点的话，

1233
01:02:58,226 --> 01:03:00,507
那我们是不是就可以在一起了？

1234
01:03:00,507 --> 01:03:06,219
在一起

1235
01:03:06,314 --> 01:03:08,536
啊？

1236
01:03:10,027 --> 01:03:12,417
呃，当然有共同点。

1237
01:03:12,417 --> 01:03:17,427
你想想，我们其实都是等待被收割的韭菜。

1238
01:03:17,427 --> 01:03:20,237
但我不是这么认为的呀。

1239
01:03:20,237 --> 01:03:23,033
因为，即使是韭菜的话，

1240
01:03:23,117 --> 01:03:25,697
你也必须得有被割的资本才行。

1241
01:03:25,847 --> 01:03:32,698
像我这样一

1242
01:03:32,698 --> 01:03:36,961
无所有

1243
01:03:37,113 --> 01:03:41,071
的人，

1244
01:03:41,071 --> 01:03:48,911
没有任何

1245
01:03:49,292 --> 01:03:55,458
被压榨

1246
01:03:55,458 --> 01:03:59,568
的价

1247
01:04:00,862 --> 01:04:03,907
值。

1248
01:04:03,907 --> 01:04:04,907
憋不住了。

1249
01:04:04,907 --> 01:04:06,237
这么不专业。

1250
01:04:06,237 --> 01:04:13,844
你要给

1251
01:04:13,844 --> 01:04:21,554
点小费

1252
01:04:21,554 --> 01:04:26,797
吗？

1253
01:04:26,797 --> 01:04:30,097
给点儿支持呗。

1254
01:04:30,097 --> 01:04:36,717
给点小费呗。

1255
01:04:36,717 --> 01:04:37,717
支持一下。

1256
01:04:37,717 --> 01:04:39,597
支持一下我的行动，各位。

1257
01:04:39,597 --> 01:04:43,937
支持一下吧，这位先生。

1258
01:04:43,937 --> 01:04:46,877
支持一下我的行动。

1259
01:04:46,877 --> 01:04:50,488
谢谢

1260
01:04:50,488 --> 01:04:56,637
先生。

1261
01:04:56,637 --> 01:04:57,617
谢谢先生。

1262
01:04:57,617 --> 01:05:00,697
天哪，先生真是大土豪。

1263
01:05:00,697 --> 01:05:02,931
谢谢，

1264
01:05:02,931 --> 01:05:09,457
谢谢这位小姐。